Name one pattern, free or not, book or PDF or whatever, in English, that is ready to go. No mistakes, no doing my own math, no secret knowledge where “everyone knows” that you have to continue the corner increases while binding off, no “go find your own buttonhole method”.
I want one, just one, fully functional, totally accurate knitting pattern. It does not have to be for a garment. And it cannot be the generic variant like a plain stockinette hat with ribbing band.
Also, no plagiarism. So if it is a washcloth with the turtle on it from the Barbara Walker books, that is not really a self contained pattern.
Seriously. I have been knitting for 6 years and never has there been a single pattern that was perfect and fully functional.
Book after book with serious errata. (I frogged the sole sock I started from the Wendy Johnson book, I doubt I will start another one ever, since the errata appeared after I started the sock, so if I start a new sock, there will be more errata.)
Nothing sized ever fits me. Not hats or mittens or shawls even. Socks are always too narrow in the toes. But that is not the fault of the designer who is creating a one-size fits most pattern. But even the be-damned pillow has mistakes.
Right now I seriously believe that anyone who buys a pattern for any knitted thing is throwing their money away. I would like to be convinced otherwise.
Does anyone have anything that is spot on perfectly accurate and ready-to-go as printed? Or is this the little girl who announces she does not want a pony for her birthday, she wants a unicorn pony. And her special party should have a dragon karaoke band and a cake baked by Hansel and Gretel.
I have more than one — I have three!
Laminaria
http://www.knitty.com/ISSUEspring08/PATTlaminaria.html
Not only was the pattern clearly charted, the designer lets you know what parts are modular, so you can change the size of the shawl. Any goofs I ran into were entirely of my own devising.
http://www.ravelry.com/patterns/library/herringbone-mittens-with-poms
http://www.ravelry.com/patterns/library/selbu-modern
All three patterns surprised me with how clear they were and how easy the charts were to read.
I’m really puzzled with your bad luck with patterns. I rarely knit from books, so maybe that’s part of it — when I get patterns online, instead of errata, I get an updated copy of the pattern (which happens pretty infrequently, and usually only with brand-new patterns.) So even if there are errors, the first wave of knitters finds them and spares everyone else the trouble.
Comment by Arlette — November 11, 2009 @ 1:00 pm
Thanks for vouching for three patterns. I had the Selbu faved but had not done anything else (I had not even saved a local copy of the pattern.)
The Laminaria looked too difficult for me, so I admired it and never considered it.
I have not bought an individual pattern. The individual (non-free) patterns I have are all from fiber club shipments. Many written by the vendor or the vendor’s close friends (because they were edited to only be useful with the given shipment.)
There was one book I borrowed from the library and every single pattern had mistakes the publisher acknowledged. (Apparently publishers OCR manuscripts to get them ready for typesetting. So the publishing process introduces errors which are only detected by the author laboriously combing through proof copies.)
I make about 4-6 knitted things per year, in an average year. My knitting is so slow that I rarely do complicated things. If I am making a regular stockinette hat, I hardly need a pattern for that. If I want to do a bit of colorwork, I will make my own chart for the hat.
I did make the jigsaw socks, but those are top down gusset and I did mine toe-up shortrow.
Normally patterns require interpolation. That is not a problem. But I did not believe there was such a thing as a paint-by-numbers complete knitting pattern.
I appreciate being shown to be wrong.
Comment by UndyedYarnpire — November 11, 2009 @ 2:03 pm
The problems with your fiber club patterns sound so frustrating! And since you’ve paid them already, the publishers don’t have to struggle to keep your dollar, so they can get away with sending out sub-par patterns. I can see why you’d start to doubt, if every pattern is a mess.
I usually keep to well-designed, self-published patterns from designers with a demonstrated commitment to quality. (That means if errors do pop up, they fix them quickly and all at once.)
Ravelry helps, too: I browse other people’s finished projects to see if the results look anything like the pattern photos, and I look for complaints or praise about the pattern itself. I’ve dodged a few duds that way, for certain.
Comment by Arlette — November 11, 2009 @ 4:17 pm
Well, the café au lait mitt pattern is problem-free. There’s not much to it, but it’s accurate.
Most crochet patterns I’ve met–thread lace, even–have been accurate at first reading, from a printed book, but perhaps that doesn’t interest you as much.
Comment by skg — November 13, 2009 @ 10:06 am
I saw your finished mitt in that pattern. I ♥ it. Thanks for vouching for the pattern itself.
I am vaguely interested that crochet patterns seem to be of high quality since that indicates a very sub-genre specific fail.
I ended up having to tink back 4 rounds of lacework on doublepoints because of the pattern error. I am so outraged and bitter. Having you and everyone else show me I have been unlucky really does help.
Comment by UndyedYarnpire — November 13, 2009 @ 3:51 pm